Rabbits Against the Machine

Rabbits Against the Machine

By: Erreh Svaia

Caprine Dispersion

“And if you go chasing rabbits, and you know you're going to fall”

White Rabbit by The Jefferson Airplane

I wouldn’t dare to mention the Chavista Venezuela as an example on innovation, considering that the regime has almost sent the country into a backwards spiral leaving them in almost Soviet times and conditions, people say that “necessity is the mother of invention”, and that could be exactly the case of what is happening in these almost surreal times in what was once one of the wealthiest countries in south America, an economic crisis triggered by the irresponsible and populist policies of the government constituted by Hugo Chávez, that has left the country almost without its former food industry or raw materials to produce foods, most of the foreign investors left the country afraid of Chávez affinity to expropriate factories from businessman not loyal to him, now Chavistas may accuse external agents for their misfortunes, but who in their sane mind will invest in such unfavorable conditions? Whereas it has been documented the government is even controlling and profiting from black market proliferation? I guess no one would, Chávez and his successor, Nicolás Maduro lack of respect towards the rule of law and the private property have has scared almost every entrepreneur that ran business in that country.

But desperation is giving way to really extreme and strange measures like the one announced a couple of days ago by the Chavista regime in the form of the “Plan Conejo”, or Rabbit Plan, consisting in applying to urban environment and experimental initiative that was initiated in farms outsides cities, consisting in distributing rabbits, yes, little bunnies for breeding, a plan conceived in order to make a source of protein to a population that has become unable to buy or even find pork, beef or even chicken, not exactly a too original plan, and not exactly of socialist nature considering that big famines occurred in socialist regimes, like Stalin´s and Mao´s, and also considering that is not too far removed from what mega capitalist Bill Gates proposed a couple of years ago in order to tackle hunger and poverty in Africa, but in Gates case it was chicken the main element for breeding, considering the fast capacity to produce more and more chickens, I must add that even Gates idea sounded crazy, logical in its nature, but considering the lack of hygienic conditions in Africa, it looked like a perfect environment for a possible epidemic outbreak (birds being perfect to carry a virus across borders, but Chavistas won´t recommend you to eat birds, they could be the spirit of the defunct Chávez, according to one of Maduro´s surreal affirmations on Youtube), in the case of Venezuela, rabbits might not be able to carry a virus too far, but rabies, an almost eradicated disease in many countries, can occur in rabbits, so I guess the Chavista government should be ready to answer themselves if they are ready to fight a possible rabies outbreak?    

In case the beginning of this disruptive measure ends up as a success, is the Chavista government ready for its continuum? Are they producing rabbits in large scale on government owned farms? Is there enough supply? What will the rabbits eat? “Two and a half kilos of high quality protein and no cholesterol”, is this an avant garde, futuristic food policy or is a cynical way to say: “eat your pets, there´s nothing else to eat”? What will happen if rabbits become scarce too? Will the Chavista regime start distributing cats and dogs? Rats or cockroaches are next? Old people turned into soylent green? It seems like Venezuela is slowly turning itself into an apocalyptic landscape that could turn into something even worse, a paradox considering that when Chávez won the presidency, it was because corruption alienated citizens thought the country couldn’t be worst…and socialism in Venezuela started proposing universal healthcare and education, and it seems that it would end using rabbits against imperialism, this is not Alice in Wonderland, it’s more like Nigtmareland, and Maduro keeps chasing a White Rabbit...and falling into a hole...